Category: social media

The Scarcity Mindset of Red vs Blue

It’s been a wild ride here in the United States, as everyone around the world has probably followed. As a U.S. resident the opinions, the reactions, and the culture have been like nothing I have seen before. Truly surprising. What has surprised me the most has been the personal ethics and scarecity mindsets I have observed, from my fellow Americans sharing on social media.

The Roar of Social Media

For a land of opportunity and abundance, there are certainly a lot of conflicting opinions on that statement. Some people are quite in touch with the struggles of inflation and the economy and others are participating in conspicuous consumption. Some are lamenting in blue and some are gloating in red, others are calling for retrospection and unity, but one thing has been the common thread – it’s a bigger knot of problems than I ever expected, and untangling this is going to take more time than I think most people are willing to give it.

There is impatience and aggression. A celebration of nastiness on every level that I am shocked by. How long has this nasty edge been living under the surface waiting for us to notice its venom? How does the simple act of Patrick Ta’s eyeshadow being priced at $42 become a hotbed of elitism and premeditated nastiness towards complete strangers on the internet? It’s bizarre and I can only guess it has nothing to do with eyeshadow and more with a deep level of dissatisfaction in our current world.

Loss of Gentleness

I saw increasing pressure from political ads this year to be afraid of what lurks in the blue and the red. The election is over yet I am still getting ads targeting this fear and exploiting our peace for the sake of agenda. It is maddening and disheartening to me that we are allowing our peace to be stolen. Especially the peace of those most vulnerable in society.

I’m observing responses from people I follow who are letting their fear isolate them. I saw a call to clear out friends lists “to control what you can” like burning bridges is healthy advice for all situations. It can be, but it can also lead to a lot of pain and loneliness. Acting on emotions is a shifting sand. When your emotions change how can your choices be healthy and stable in the long run? There is more chance of self-sabotage than true desire.

I have been a bridge burner and when I look back at what fueled my decisions, it was not a healthy mindset. It was one deep in crisis allowing the self-destructive nature to keep me from moving forward. I’m also not writing this to judge anyone. I’m writing this from a place of concern to keep others from making the same mistakes as me. Mistakes that I wish I could take back.

One thing I have taken from these last few weeks is the importance of gentleness and patience. We are fully capable of living in a community with others who disagree with us if we choose to be gracious to one another and respect healthy boundaries. Not playing on each others’ fear or looking for fights. That’s just plain mean and not how you maintain relationships. That has been the number one thing I have noticed through this 2024 election cycle, is the lack of focus on America being one community and learning how to work with each other in our differences.

Truth and Realignment

I’m not saying my culture needs to let bullies keep bullying or evil take root for the sake of peace. I think we need to kick bad out and leave room for the good and the truth to flourish. What I am saying is that I think we need to pause, take a breath, and be willing to try reconciling. If it’s bad and causes more pain, okay, then we stop and reevaluate, but I don’t think it would be.

I think my fellow citizens are weary and lonely. We need each other to embrace our differences to see that we have more common ground than we have let agendas tell us we do.

Thinking purple instead of red and blue would be a good start. Abandoning the scarcity mindset would also be a healthy move toward letting go of fear. Especially as believers, there is nothing to fear if we fully surrender to God.

This has just been on my heart lately, dear reader, and I hope I haven’t offended you. I’ve been feeling creatively off from the sheer amount of negativity being spread. It is draining as an HSP neurodivergent introvert who seeks to spread kindness and love yet can’t fix the pain of people in my community. I wish I could and maybe this post is at least a safe space to ponder and start new conversations? I’m trying to focus on the positive.

We will also be back to our regularly scheduled programming of sewing, knitting, art, Bible Study, and K-pop content soon. This just felt too important to ignore.

Thank you for taking time with me today. I hope you know that you are loved and worthy. Until next time 🫶

Pop Press, Historical Biases, and the Straw Man of Politics

What is historical bias? As I dove deeper into my historical training, it became the elephant in the room of every class discussion and the turf monster of every thesis. It is where worldview intersects with historical interpretation and constructs an invisible wall between historical accuracy and interpretation in our present.

Even with firsthand accounts or eyewitness testimony of events, personal bias, and interpretation passively or actively weave themselves into the evidence. It is inescapable.

Something that I’ve gleaned, with a better understanding of, has been from listening to Biblical scholars meditate through the Greek and Hebrew translations of the Bible aka primary sources. It is truly an extraordinary work to ponder accounts from the past and sift through the biases we have as moderns to catch a fleeting moment of connection with the past filled with as deep of empathy for their pov as we can.

It is fleeting because the easier and more common way we interact with history is through quick and heavily biased source material.

A thesis-first and evidence-second approach, instead of first studying the evidence and letting it reveal the thesis is how we as humans prefer to communicate. But what we will gain if we let the text talk to us. Letting the text speak is similar to the Socratic method except instead of a conversation with people, you let the sources speak.

This does not translate well to our current pace of consuming information. It is slow and requires patience to study and understand the matter at hand from many angles. Therefore the “pop press” way of disseminating information, like the History Channel so often uses, rises from the ashes once again to the far reaches of TikTok, Instagram, and YouTube.

This is not to say that only bad history or bad thesis drafting is a product of social media. I’ve learned wonderful details about a vast array of histories, fashion, language, and culture through these social platforms that I couldn’t have had access to at college, because the experts didn’t exist. Dress History wasn’t even a widely accepted specialty during my time in college. Social Media has provided a platform for niche history lovers to share their passion with a new audience. Social Media also provides a salon of discussion to debunk myths or provide deeper context to a subject that was given the “pop press” treatment.

So why am I writing about this today? I was watching a video from a creator who used to be a fantastic source of fashion and film content, a 2000s historian of girlhood with insightful and researched evidence that let the text speak. The original work was so high caliber that this current slump into heavily biased “historical” fashion videos and content that is just politics loosely veiled as film or fashion-focused, has been a great disappointment to me. The creator is so talented, and to see them be swayed by forces that are in our culture is sad.

Not only a disappointment, but it has shown me how important it is to stay committed to awareness of historical biases and the humble acknowledgment that we can’t talk in absolutes when it comes to interpretation. We have to be open to exploring the sources from many points of view and not let ourselves be mouthpieces of modernity, with the clever out of “victors write history” so what is the point of going deeper.

Victors certainly change history and can try to control its narrative, but history is the story of humanity and is bigger than one group’s manipulation.

For example, in my wheelhouse, I am the descendant of Irish immigrants who were potato farmers in Cork. The Potato Famine was discussed historically as just a blight. Bad luck. Not a big deal. Oh well. The crisis was met with such apathy that Irish clergyman Jonathan Swift, wrote “A Modest Proposal” to draw attention to the British attitude towards the Irish was not unlike the absurdity of his proposal.

But now, we know that this event can be classified as a genocide because the British colonized Ireland for centuries. There was enough food in Ireland until the British stole it and imported it out of their colony of Ireland. The “victors” affect history but their version is not the guaranteed final version forever. They inflict death and destruction but this will not stay in the shadows forever, the light is greater than the dark.

My point is that this summation, “The victors write history” is paltry.

So what started this ramble of historical bias?

A video essay about the history of the Goth aesthetic which had random political bias inserted as fact and a lack of nuance to the conclusions based on a clearly preconceived thesis where evidence was cherry-picked to fill out a video that wasn’t really about Goth style. It was about our Nov 5, 2024 election and unnecessarily put a lot of negativity out into the world instead of talking about the Goth aesthetic.

I believe it’s time that we as a society stop stirring up dissension and casual hate in the name of the political savior. These candidates never save anything. They try their best but they are just humans. Is it worth hating an entire group of people because they hold different views? Never.

No human is perfect, so how can human government create a perfect society? It’s a straw man.

I hope in time, the strong political biases I see swaying storytelling in my culture will sour. Instead, I hope an appetite for deep discussion to understand each side of the coin will spring forth. For truth, for the sake of truth, warts and all. For deeper connection. To understand what people believe and why they believe, with mutual respect, and respect for the biases we hold so that we don’t let our biases keep us from true understanding and continue to fertilize this culture of casual hate I am seeing in 2024.

I hope this post is not too convoluted. I wanted to discuss this without saying what creator I am referring to because it is not them I want to critique but the fallacy they have fallen under and the way they are approaching history, politics, and interpretation of these things without the awareness of their personal bias. It’s creating foolish and unuseful content that reads more as pop press propaganda than well-researched discussion, which is what I think they excel at doing. I believe they are amazing and I want to see their talent shine once again!

Bias is such a difficult thing to wrestle with and I acknowledge that no matter how I tried to check mine at the door, it still persists. I try to hold it loosely and pursue the truth, but I am an imperfect human. 

Thank you, reader, for being here and I hope this was an interesting ramble if nothing else. If I have offended you, I humbly ask for your grace and willingness to love others – enemy or friend, because that is how we will make this world a better place.

Thank You for 100 Subscribers!

While I was on vacation up to Erie I received exciting news! I saw this blog has reached 100 subscribers! It made my day. I am so grateful to everyone who has subscribed. You guys are amazing! I appreciate every view, every visitor, every like. It’s given me purpose in a season of transition, helped me get back into writing, and drawing, and feel more comfortable sharing Potato Technology designs online. It has also been a rewarding way to connect with people worldwide which I find exciting.

I’m hoping in time to connect more, and maybe keep comments on my posts to get to know you more. I’m just shy and scared of getting hate comments when I want this to be a safe space. Maybe in 2025? I’ll keep trying to be brave.

I’m looking forward to sharing bits about my trip and some more sewing and knitting projects I’ve completed in September. September was a busy month! I think heading into October, I’ve needed a break. It was good to get away and refresh. I’ve been feeling a bit of writer’s block the past week so I took a small break from the blog too, hoping to have renewed my creativity!

Thank you, dear reader, for such an amazing milestone! I hope you have a wonderful day and that I see you around the blog again. There are many exciting things I have planned that I would love to share with you. I hope you know that you are loved and worthy just as you are.

Slow It Down, Make It Bouncy

I think the only thing bouncy here is me feeling like I’m bouncing off the walls of my creative box after setting a goal in 2024. This goal was to get serious about my sewing and knitting Instagram account, use the creator metric tools, and learn how to use my digital marketing background to create engagement.

The Focus

I wanted a lifestyle change, an actual commitment to taking this seriously and it has worked. Follower count is a garbage stat on Instagram as mine hops around like a binkying rabbit, but engagement, interactions, and reach have been insightful tools to see how this can grow and what I should be working towards.

Now that it is Q4, um, I am creatively burnt out. So many reels, so much video recording, so many moments having to stare at my own face and body because I am the model, and try not to get body dysmorphia or feel self-absorbed. Yikes it messes with the head. The way some pieces of content have huge runs of traffic and some fall flat must be what it feels like to find the crab and miss the crab on the same string of pots. It’s wild.

My Internal Monologue

I spend time tracking and comparing one piece of content against another one that performed better on a different day or was posted at the same hour, so why did it perform differently? Did I use the right tags? How do I capture the same magic in a new piece of content? Should I use a formula for my pictures or videos? Oh no! Am I one note? How do I mix it up? Was that the right song? Should I create more content with trendy sounds? Was it my hair? Is it because I haven’t painted my sewing room yet? If I paint it a color I like will it perform better or worse? Should I paint it a sad beige? No that’s insane.

I miss the days of making content that didn’t feature my face, or my designs, and was not solely based on my own deadlines. But I hated that job?! Why do I miss the days of launching that Employee App or writing for an internal corporate magazine that was employee propaganda? I think its the artistic blues mixed with the echo chamber of the algorithim. When I get stuck in the metrics and the trends, I’ve noticed I have blinders to the things that are going well. Instead of appreciating any person who takes the time to watch my reels or like my posts, I refuse to let myself feel happiness.

It’s really unhealthy. It’s killing my mindset and keeping me from feeling inspired to create or to write. I’m just bottling it all up because I’m embarrassed of how this is getting to me. I feel silly. And because I am building something, and don’t feel like I have something to show for it, even though I do because it is on the internet. But how else in 2024 can you reach people in our world of technological disruption to our sense of community? So its not silly. It is work and can lead to something.

Wake Up

It’s time I creatively refresh and slow down. I’ve accomplished my goal of making it a habit and learning how to grow engagement. It’s time to shift gears. It’s October and I’ve barely written a piece of fiction or poetry. My artistic practice has slowed, my sketchbook gathering dust. What about Japanese, Korean, and the language of the piano? So dusty.

How about my goal to knit socks? It’d be nice to try at least one before 2025.

So as October, November, and December stretch out to the horizon, I’m looking forward to finishing this year strong and with renewed purpose. This blog is for all my hobbies; unfortunately, sewing is my coping mechanism. And when that landlord said we had to buy or get out, I went into a full-on sewing spiral.

It’s been a fun time. I’ve sewn so much more than I’ve even had the time to share on Instagram or the blog. It’s starting to get lost, all those moments, with haste instead of being shared with patience and proper love.

So I’m going to start. This afternoon I sat down and learned how to play the beginning of Für Elise. Tomorrow I hope to write and to feel free to create slowly. To be intentional with my time and pull my mind back into writing and the things I want to write about in my heart. Maybe some yoga thrown in there too.

What I Would Pick for the ‘Sew Your Decade’ Challenge

In honor of National Sewing Month and the 160 years of their existence the big four – Simplicity, McCall’s, Butterick, and Vogue Patterns are taking a look back at their patterns. The Simplicity Creators group turned this little moment of fashion history into a challenge, Sew Your Decade. I first learned about this through a video from Stephanie Canada where she took a look at the patterns Simplicity was highlighting on their ‘Stitch in Time’ historical presentation of patterns and fashions made by these four companies over the years. A lot of them were reproduction patterns and had dubious choices, including some 1950s patterns in the 1960s. But that’s more of an editing problem.

Because I have a lot of other projects in progress but I love historical fashion, I thought I would take a look through the historical pattern wiki and choose a pattern from each decade of what I would want to make if I had the time to make a garment from each era. I’m using the vintage patterns wikia and historical sources instead of the patterns on Simplicity’s site because the originals are just more appropriate and imaginative than the ones selected on the timeline and the reproductions they sell currently.

1800s Era (1860s-1890s)

Butterick 9111; ca. 1897; Ladies’ and Girls’ French Bathing Costume. 
Pictured in September 1897 Butterick catalog.

I choose this bathing costume because it is such a unique relic from the past but also because we’ve seen some new designs for swimwear come out recently that reimagine the typical 20th century-21st century swim suit, that look less like bikinis and more like a crop top and a skirt.

1900-1910s Era

McCall 1675; ca. 1907; Ladies’ Eton Jacket (with deep armholes).
Featured in McCall’s Magazine September 1907.

What a fabulous jacket! That’s why I would choose this Eton jacket from 1907 because not only would it create a great historical silhouette, I’d love to try styling it with other items from my modern wardrobe.

1920s Era

McCall 4261; ©1926; Ladies’ and Misses’ Bathrobe (Vintage Pattern Wikia)

The flapper dress patterns you see in the store are so played out and inaccurate. My choice was influenced by the wonderfully boxy lines of this robe. It encapsulates the straight up and down silhouette of the time while looking like a piece that could be dressed up or down, for around the house or used for wearable garment in the right fabric.

1930s Era

Simplicity 1832; ca. 1935; Ladies Swagger Coat and Six Gore Skirt. Coat has full raglan sleeve tucked at the wrist, patch pockets, stand-up collar and inverted back pleat.

Oh my goodness, this coat is fabulous. I may try to track this down in the future just to try my hand at it because I love these style lines. I love the raglan sleeves with the contrast of the narrow 1930s skirt. It’s so chic.

1940s Era

McCall 4037; ©1941; Ladies’ & Misses’ Dress

I like the academic style of view A and the elegant style lines of view B. I think I would get a lot of wear out of a dress in this style. The 1940s are one of my favorite eras for vintage fashion, I love the style lines of this time period and the 1920s-1930s.

1950s Era

McCall’s 4674; ©1958; Misses’ and Junior Dress with Attached Petticoat.

The 1950s is not my favorite era of fashion, mainly because this silhouette looks horrible on me and it’s really over done when people think of “vintage” so for inspiration I went to 1958, the year my grandparents got married to find something interesting. I like the bow on the front of this and flounce of the skirt. The shape reminds me a bit of a bridesmaids dress I tried on that my grandma wore for her friends’ wedding in the 1950s.

1960s Era

Vogue Paris Original 1434; ca. 1965; Pierre Cardin – Suit. Side-buttoned jacket with standing, bias ring collar and cuffs. Tie belt at front, welt pocket and three-quarter length sleeves. Slim skirt.

I chose this one, first because I had yet to choose a Vogue pattern and secondly, because this suit is sharp and screams 1960s glamour. I love the over sized buttons. The classic shape and the slightly mod-artsy feel of the over all look.

1970s Era

Simplicity 7887; ©1977; Go Everywhere in Misses’ Jumpsuit and Unlined Jacket: Top-stitched jumpsuit with front seam interest has front zipper, buckled back tabs and optional rolled-up cuffs. Top-stitched jacket with collar interest has front button closing, flaps and long set-in sleeves with button trim.

This is a unique pattern. I like how many styling options we get in the line drawings. It’s an interesting jumpsuit I could see made up in several types of fabric for casual or fancy styling. I should see the blazer made in a contrast fabric or the same. Jumpsuits were a staple of the 1960s and 1970s so I think this is a great option to represent the decade.

1980s Era

McCall’s 8495; ©1983; Misses’ Dress and Tie Belt: Dress has square neckline, elasticized waistline, center back zipper and sleeves with elastic in shoulder casings. Self fabric tie belt.

This pattern is so extra. I didn’t realize how much the cottagecore aesthetic pulled from this time period – wow! I thought the 1980s was just inspired by the 1940s, but there is a lot more there to see. I think this would be a great upcycling project with bedsheets.

1990s Era (I’m vintage?)

McCall’s 7241; ©1994; Misses’ Jumper and Overalls: Loose fitting jumper view A and B or overalls view C with lined bodices have suspenders fastened in front with buttons or overalls buckles; jumpers have side seam pockets; overalls have front yoke and pockets.

I originally wanted to pull from 1993, but this pattern is too perfect for me. I honestly want to make all three of these. I have fabric that would work for view B. I wonder how difficult it would be to track down?

Closing Thoughts

A special thanks to Vintage Pattern Wikia for making it possible to browse vintage patterns and for keeping these moments of fashion history alive. Thanks also to Stephanie Canada for putting this on my radar and for sewists like her who are keeping vintage patterns accessible to us to sew with. This was a fun challenge posed by the Simplicity Creators group and Simplicity itself for putting this on all of our radar. Although I’m not going to sew anything from what I found because I seriously have to many projects to add another right now. It’s a great way to appreciate vintage paper patterns and the effect they have had fashion and clothing in the last 160 years. Sewing your own clothes is such a great way to make things that fit you, and have your own flair, they also combat the unhinged mayhem that is fast fashion. It’s a win win 🙂

Gotta Work? Got To Surrender First.

Since we settled in here, I’ve had a rough time. I’m not sleeping well consistently. It’s been a challenge to let down after a season of being on guard, on point, agile, and ready to work. I’ve felt behind on my own timelines after my workroom was boxed up and put into storage for a few weeks.

It was just a few weeks, but it felt longer, and I know why. I’ve been convicted of this as I’ve been reading Crazy Love by Francis Chan. My timeline and my plan were interrupted and that frustrated me. I am struggling with both control and pride. Woah, goosebumps. My grandma would be so pleased that I am talking about this.

Pride and Control

In the scary moments, God took over and directed my life and my steps from April 27 to June 7. In the meantime, I had to fully surrender my time and my trust to Him. I did and everything did turn out fine, better than expected. It was a big moment of growth for me, as a member of a little club called ‘waiting for the other shoe to drop’ instead of trusting in faith. This was a big step.

But as human nature and sin go, as soon as things got easier I began to slack off. I have been a huge slacker in my quiet time with the Lord, in both prayer and consistently reading His word and dwelling on its meaning. We are called as believers to meditate on His word, instead I’ve been filling my head with other things. My focus shifted from God’s plan back to my desires.

I’ve felt this intense pressure to not let myself rest. To work, work harder, and don’t stop. I’ve been obsessing about how to make money with skills to provide again. How to feel validation and success in this big life step that has made me feel out of control. I’ve been craving the ability to make money, build our savings back up, quickly pay back the mortgage, and “feel safe” after such a big financial step.

How am I “unsafe” or in danger now though? This sentiment has been marinating in my brain for too long. I know why. I have not been properly nourishing my soul, nor have I been renewing my mind.

Wake Up Call

God provided everything and more when I was in danger of my life falling apart. This happened because I humbled myself and did it His way. I let Him lead. I’ve been convicted by the truth that Francis Chan points to in his chapter, Profile of the Obsessed. I woke me up to what I’m working towards and what I’m obsessed with and neither of those aligns with where my life was oriented towards through giving up control and letting God lead. I can’t just wrangle the control back because I’m scared. I have no idea where I’m headed, but God does so it is a lot safer to let Him lead.

I’ve been convicted by Chan’s words of truth that my actions since the house purchase and move-in have not been in my best interest, because I’ve given into my need for control. Sadly this demonstrates my lack of trust and faith, like a” micromanaging boss. I’ve told myself that I “know” better. This is too much to take on with the resources God has provided. The math is not mathing. I need to “fix” this on my own.

Oof, I sound like a rude, self-centered jerk.

The worst part? I am treating my Creator like this. I am ashamed.

Acceptance and Second Chances

Every time I think I’ve matured past my pride and need to control my life, this behavior rears its ugly head. But thankfully this past week, I’ve had to slow down and log off. My allergies went from 0-60 as ragweed pollen bloomed, my lack of sleep caught up to me and I began to feel worn out. Our internet has gone out twice and in those times I got my head out of Instagram, out of my to-do list, and away from blog posts and knitting deadlines, to read Crazy Love. Crazy Love is a book I started reading in the Spring, that I completely abandoned this summer because I was busy with other things. But without videos or music or scrolling to distract me, I found the quiet moment to get back to what was important. My relationship with my Saviour and getting nourished through God’s truth, this time by the encouragement and theology of Crazy Love.

In every page I’ve read in the past week, I’ve felt humbled and challenged to consider where my focus lies and where it should be. It has shifted to myself and my own wants, instead of God and his Kingdom. Safety and success I’ve put above what brings Him glory for my own. How can I ever expect to succeed without Him? Especially when everything good in my life comes from Him and at the end of the day is His.

The worst part is that my generous hand, who was fulfilled and rejoiced in giving, has been too scared about money to give with the same abandon and joy that I used to do. Because I’ve been worrying about money, seeing it with a scarcity mindset instead of abundance and gratitude for what I have. I am not talking about manifesting here, I’m talking about true gratitude and recognition for the provision of God. I’ve been doing this and not trusting in God to provide for my needs.

It happens so quick. I feel like Peter after the rooster crowed the third time. Or like the Israelites asking to go back to Egypt after God parted the Red Sea and delivered them from their captors because freedom was unfamiliar so they were afraid and would rather go back to the bondage they knew.

There’s a line in the song ‘Looking for a Place to Happen’ by the Tragically Hip that says, “Where they’d stamp on burning bags of sh*t.” Yeah, I feel like my efforts this summer, pushing instead of trusting, worrying instead of praying have been as useful as stomping on burning bags of poop.

Thankfully God is a God of agape love and second chances for those who humble themselves, repent, and follow Him. So that’s what I need to be doing this month. Resetting back to what sustains me, that is God, not my own effort. It’s humbling and freeing.

Looking to the Future

This July has been the first time I’ve recognized that feeling of time passing. The year is halfway over, what do I want to do with these last six months to finish the year strong?

In May, I felt like my life was done, as I knew it. Like a video game, I was done, out of hearts, out of health, game over. June felt like an exciting adventure and a respawn of my little game character in a new environment but the same life. It was thrilling and overwhelming at times, there was so much to catch up on and so much to do to begin our life in our house. July however has been this month of my brain feeling like it is in hyperspeed. Now that I have a new space to create, I also have new creative energy. That two-month break spent packing, moving, and waiting, was like a creative refresh and since then July has been a sprint.

I think some of this wild energy has been all the excitement of this month as part of the STAY fandom, this has truly been a one-of-a-kind comeback, but also I’ve been seeking distraction. My mom is walking through a health condition that came out of nowhere and in a matter of a few weeks she went from my companion packing boxes to being unable to do much physical activity without her body sending off alarm bells. I’ve never seen her like this before, and if I stop to think about it too much, I freak out.

I’ve turned my attention to what the second half of the year could bring. There have been so many wonderful things on the horizon, my friend’s wedding, my sister-in-law’s new place, Kyle’s new woodshop, the possibility of adopting a rabbit from E.A.R.S, Shakerwoods, the Pittsburgh Renaissance Festival, apple picking, Pumpkinville, etc. I’ve begun planning Christmas presents for loved ones, trying to be more ambitious than ever to push myself to learn something new in the process. I’ve also been feeling the itch to actually sell my pieces. I think it’s time, I just have to figure out where and how.

Creating Sewing and Knitting Tutorials on Instagram

In February, I started sharing short content tutorials, micro-vlogs, and step-by-step knitting patterns for free on Instagram reels. After four months of content creation and thinking like an instructor, how has this changed my thoughts on my purpose? Has it changed my own sewing and knitting skills? Let’s jump in!

I began sharing my work on Instagram back in 2017 as a writer, as my interest in clothes-making pivoted in 2020, so did my Instagram. My intention was a portfolio and not a content creator because, to be honest, that term makes me uncomfortable. It has been a barrier to wanting to share videos consistently when actually making videos that share not just what I made but how I made it, bring me the most joy.

In 2024, I began seeking out a sewing community online, and through this, I found shining examples of creative women and men who yes were creating content but we incredibly passionate about sharing their knowledge and skills to help others create and learn. Instead of it being about a platform and social media fame, it was about education and community to keep art forms like sewing and knitting thriving while helping people see an alternative to fast fashion.

It had a purpose that aligned with where I felt called to be. I want to do more with these skills than just sell people something, I want to create change and equip others with life skills. That’s not to say I wouldn’t love to make fashion that people can and want to wear, that would be awesome! It’s complicated.

I have Potato Technology as a name for my “label” but it is more of an abstract than a business. I’d like to expand more on this at another time, but long story short, I’ve been wrestling with what my skills should be working towards. A business? A fashion line? A following on Instagram? What is success in 2024? What should I define myself with? What is my motivation? These are questions I’ve had and been uncertain how to answer.

What has been a breath of fresh air has been seeing how to apply these skills in a way that they can be useful. In practicing for months these little tutorials, I think I’m discovering why I believe sewing and knitting are vital skills to have. It’s been a journey of discovery! I love showing how I make something. From the tools and tips I have discovered over the past four years or what the process looks like, someone can feel inspired and hopefully confident to give sewing and knitting a try!

That matters to me. I learned to sew and knit through YouTube and it was a game changer. But a lot of things at the moment are being put behind paywalls with subscriptions, courses, memberships, etc. I feel like information that you used to be able to learn from your community or family members is slowly being lost and reshelved behind tipping screens. I don’t think it’s right or fair, nor is it good for our culture to lose art forms that are so vital to daily life. We all wear clothing, we all have garments that need repairs, etc. Making should be an option instead of buying being the only option.

My long-term goal is to find a way to share the tutorials here in a way that makes sense for the platform, as I continue to do I realize all this filming has distracted me from writing. Hopefully, I will find a better balance now that I am moved in and settling into new routines at our house. I’m excited to share more on that story too because it taught me so much about agape love, the kindness of strangers, and how important family and community is to making things go right.

Thank you, dear reader, for taking time for me today. I hope that you know that you are loved, you are worthy, and that without you this blog would be simply a girl with a computer typing into a void. Thank you for your support! I always appreciate it!

My Experience with PDF Sewing Patterns

Earlier this year, when I was planning what I wanted to make as additions to my wardrobe I found a brown, I believe it is taffeta fabric, in my stash. I’ve been at a loss of what to do with it since I got it because it’s so different than what I usually sew with, but that’s a good thing! I know it will push me out of my comfort zone with its hue and shiny finish, so I want that garment to be special when I finally make something out of it. I do not want a repeat of the pink scuba pants!

I’ve pondered using it as a lining fabric for my pirate coat, I’ve also considered using it as an underlayer for a sheer fabric I have in my stash, etc. So far nothing felt right, aside from an idea I saw while watching one of my favorite sewing channels on YouTube. She makes fabulous dresses from self-drafted, big four paper patterns, and buys indie PDF sewing patterns that all turn out so lovely, I want to try them all.

So on a whim, I went first to Mood Fabrics’ Sewciety page to see what they had to offer in their free selection and eventually found myself on Etsy, looking at the exact dress pattern she made on a video I was watching. Spontaneously, I clicked purchase on a dress pattern and clicked instant download. A dress, I thought, that would be perfect! I can style it up and down, in heat and in snow, it will be my go-to piece! To quote Lee Corso, not so fast!

It was mighty easy, but also mighty paper-hungry. This was something I was not expecting. You see, as far as PDF patterns go, I knew they required printing, but I always thought it was like 10 pages max. It seemed like something that would be straightforward. You know what I mean? To my surprise, it was 29 pages of just the pattern plus 5 more pages for the instruction and sizing. Um, holy lots of ink!

Yeah, I was not expecting that from my first one. So I looked more closely at the Mood patterns I was browsing to see if those would be any better and I saw another flaw in my plan, the patterns specifically from Mood use a ridiculous amount of yardage. Like a mini dress was calling for 5 yards of 57″ across the fabric. I can make a mini dress in 3 yards or less. Is this just a ploy to sell fabric? Mood Fabrics’ average price is USD 14-18 per yard, multiplied by 5 and it is beginning to be a very expensive project if you follow the fabric suggestions. I have a lot of questions now.

But anyway, I went back to the Etsy PDF pattern and decided to throw caution to the wind and begin printing. And print we did! The gentle hum of the printer slider traveling to and through filled the room, with the chorus of the squeaky paper roller delivering page upon page of freshly printed pattern sections to be cut out and taped, onto the desk. As I sat, staring at the screen, I began to get fidgety. I began to look around the room and stare at my computer screen, eventually perusing the listing again, and I noticed one small potential problem in this plan. As the pattern maker was an American, I thought for sure the sizing would be in US sizes, but alas the numbers on the chart were slightly askew from the standard. And I realized two things I would have to face, comparing the yardage to the pattern and taking my measurements to determine my size.

It was a slip dress, so the 3.5 yards I had available on the opaque fabric seemed like an obvious choice. There certainly would be enough, surely there would be enough, but oh no, there wasn’t. The pattern wanted more. I also grabbed the measuring tape and prepared for battle because no matter how badly I didn’t want to care what those numbers said. Those numbers always intimidate me. So with butterflies in my stomach, I grabbed the tape measure and learned that it wasn’t going to be my weight that would keep me from being able to make this but my literal body proportions. My frame. My long torso. My straight up-and-down waist.

I didn’t fit into any size proportions, none. Going up or going down a size was all off. As the freshly-inked paper kept rolling off the presses I felt stress, uncertainty, and frustration at myself for being such a novice thinking this would be easy!

But why isn’t it simple? When I buy paper patterns from the big four it is simple! When I’ve looked at vintage patterns, yes there is a little bit of knowledge needed to understand the sizing – your measurements – but other than that simple! Was I really going to have to pattern hack or pattern grade specific pieces on this paid-for, already drafted pattern? Was it basically going to be as complicated as making my own from scratch?

In that moment, I was incredibly humbled. Here I was learning to sew, designing my own clothes, I want to turn it into a business with the most logical option seeming to be PDF sewing patterns, but my word, this is a tough product to produce! This is incredibly more difficult than I imagined and I don’t think this is how I want to contribute to fashion space. Because not only do you have to make the pattern, the instructions, and go through testing, but I think on a PDF format, if you don’t have a vast size range or even a curvy or athletic build variation, I don’t think the pattern is being done properly.

I could not make the slip dress pattern work because it was cut for an hourglass shape and I have a straight up and down waist, no matter how skinny I get, it’s never going to fit me properly without alterations to the lines of the dress. That discouraged me. I stopped the printing and chose to call it a mulligan. The same issues with standard sizing hit me like a wall in a place I never expected.

What the answer is, I don’t know. But I do know I think the PDF pattern market may be the same ship different day repackaged in a way that creates more work and potentially less waste? On that, I’m not convinced because it is so much ink and paper. I don’t know. It still felt like a lot of consumption was happening. It’s a shame. I feel like I accomplished nothing in the long run. I believe I’ve found a problem I’d like to address if/when I ever figure out how to make my own patterns. Thankfully there are a lot of creative people in this world who may be developing the solution already. I hope so.

What about you? Have you purchased an indie PDF sewing pattern? Were you pleased? Did you feel like it was easier than buying paper patterns or self-drafting? Thanks again for spending time with me today, dear reader. I hope you have a lovely day. ❤

#49 – Deactivating Facebook

In 2011, my senior year of high school, one of my close friends opted to not come back to our school for his final year and instead chose to do cyber school which meant, because of how much time he already spent working and playing a little game called war of warcraft, I was going to lose contact with him. Now, at the time, I had known this friend since we were toddlers, through church and later on school, it seemed too important to let that friendship fade into nothingness just because of change of life. I knew there was one modern way to stay connected, a way I dreaded and had put off as long as possible – Facebook. And so in 2011, I bit the bullet and got one.

I instantly regretted my decision.

All of a sudden my feed was filled with information overload in the way only social media can with details that honestly make you feel a bit insecure, like realizing, I knew I was a bit of an outsider at school but oh my, a lot of parties and social events were happening that weren’t on my radar that were now showcased page after page. Suddenly, the peace and tranquility of my quiet introverted life, one connected to people outside classmates, was gone. Poof. I felt a comparison. I felt lacking. I felt lame. A person missing the plot that everyone else got. Who were these people I thought I knew?

Was I doing this all wrong? Should I have more friends? The friend count, the status symbol of ye olde Facebook, some of my fellow friends had 1000s of friends and I was struggling to think of 100 people I knew well enough to add. The profile picture, the clever status updates, the albums upon albums of photos of normal days and things. What was this weird and aspirational world? And where did my feeling of contentment go? In an instant, it left me like a hat on a windy day.

I look back on this feeling and wish I had rolled the dice on keeping in touch through email or text because that friendship didn’t last once we entered college and went our separate ways, but those feelings of insecurity and comparison, they took root. Not just me, but I think all of us are waking up to this and how social media is stealing our joy and our world from what it can be.

After all, we know now that Facebook is a terrible way to keep friendships going, except we didn’t know that yet. I mean I think everyone over the age of 60 at the time knew it was not a replacement for having a social life, but we like intrepid explorers too cocky to listen to the warning that the river was going to turn into a waterfall went tally-ho onward into the mist and went over the waterfall. And now with our broken bits of boat and sputtering of water in our lungs, we see our friends float by us in the river and yet just like the metaphor, we are unable to link arms because the current of the algorithm is taking us where it wants to. Unhappy and alone, we arrived in 2024 and it was time for me to climb ashore.

I was watching the first season of the Great British Bake Off with Mary Berry, Paul Hollywood, Sue Perkins, and Mel Giedroyc, circa 2010 and I felt this overwhelming yearning to go back, back to 2010. Like this scene in Joe Wright’s Pride and Prejudice where Elizabeth sees Mr. Darcy appear in the fading mist of dawn.

I thought about this, why did I feel such a strong pull toward this time? I don’t particularly love the fashion of this period nor was it the most exciting time of my life, it was high school for goodness sake with the season of SATs and college applications. But it was strung together with moments of deep authenticity, real connections, and life spent living in real life instead of online. I spent my days with real people, not a screen with someone behind the screen talking to me. It was real and my world, with my people. I wasn’t worrying about FOMO or what other people were doing, I didn’t consider what other people were doing if I wasn’t there or how I should be spending my time compared to what other people were doing. I was just living. It was before social media had its claws into me and the world.

I remember the world being less performative, less homogenous, and more authentic. If someone was cool it was usually because they were doing their own thing and owning it. If someone was pursuing a hobby or a career it was because they had a passion for it, not for social media clout or to be like everyone else. Phones were for texts and phone calls, sometimes photos. At social events, particularly family events and meals, they stayed in your pocket.

If you were using your phone you were actively talking to someone. People knew things and retained information because Google wasn’t at the ready. You had to discuss and determine things through research, using a book or a computer. Photos existed in physical albums, in frames, on fridges, and in wallets. Body dysmorphia existed, but was less of a constant because in person you can’t Photoshop and filter, you have to accept who you are enough to be in person. Trips were shared through home movies, photos, and stories around a table with food and drink.

At that moment, I realized I was done. Done with pretending I like this fake world of connection. I separated my Instagram from my Facebook so that I could continue sharing photos to my Instagram sewing portfolio account, because that is for exposure not connecting, and deactivated my Facebook. I kept Messenger so that three specific people could still reach me and I hit that deactivate button. And I have to say, it felt like a fake haze lifted from my world. That chapter was done and I feel a peace washing over me again.

If it was as easy as leaving one social media platform, what other little swaps could I do to find those things that made the world feel so real and connected before the social media age? That is my next quest. Onward into normal, human connections!

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