This is a bit of a follow-up to my discussion of cultural boredom from earlier this year, a little update to my creative slump, and exciting developments for my hunt to replace my reliable crafting supplies. The world still feels like it is on fire, but I think I am learning how to thrive again. It takes me a long time to process things, so maybe that’s why?
Spaghetti and Gnarly
Le Sserafim released a song that captures the wonderfully nonsensical world of a good K-pop song. Spaghetti is catchy, silly, and makes me crave spaghetti, so that’s what I am cooking tonight. It is what I remember the music videos of K-pop to look like when I took the plunge in 2022. It was fun, and in the last few years, it has lost some of its luster with darker concepts, instead of cute, and a bit uninspired. Although I’m fully into K-pop, it has been repetitive and bland for most of 2025. Except for my favorites – Stray Kids and Nmixx. Enter Gnarly by Katseye. A song that is so jarring it’s bad but also amazing, it’s been a weird one for me, the thesis of this year, it has felt like. “Everything is gnarly.” A phrase that has carried me through bizarre headlines and life’s bumpy road this year. For me, Gnarly was going to be the song that typified what I remember feeling in 2025, until Bleep by Stray Kids dropped in August. But now, I hope I will remember moments that feel like the upbeat wonder of Spaghetti. What about Golden? I desperately need to compile notes for K-pop Demon Hunters because that has been such a gift.
Big Twist at Michaels
Big Twist is back at Michaels, for real, and it’s kind of silly to admit this, but it feels comforting. There’s a Joann Knit and Sew Shop section in the store, and like, maybe it was a bad dream? I mean, all the crafting drama definitely happened this year between private equity, tariffs, and Sci Show declaring the arrival of physicists to help the knitters. The familiarity was maybe all my neurodivergent mind needed to just relax a bit? Now the fabric is not good, but it could get better in time. I’m choosing to be hopeful, I mean, the recent US election showed a strong rejection of the Trump Administration, so as people have said all year, if it can get worse, it can get better. And for me, who hates change with a passion, I’ve learned that if it disappears, it can come back. I just need to work on my patience. I have found a second local yarn store in my own state, and a great local fabric shop. I’d say I’m pleased to the point that I am not missing Joann like I thought I would.
Stitches for Identity
I believe I am finally moving out of the depressed forest that is being laid off due to personal and global trauma. I’ve been listening to Kitchen and Jorn’s Losing Followers Podcast, where they have been talking through the post-Buzzfeed time of their careers. I was in a toxic job at Great Dane Trailers in the late 2010s, and it was freeing yet terrifying to lose that job. Listening to Jen and Kristin talk through the transition of leaving a job that demanded all of them, to be free from that monster, but also lose all connection to the project they built from the ground up, has been a balm to me. When I was laid off, I lost my app and my content calendar, my magazine contribution. I was wrecked, and I didn’t know how to process that for years. I felt like a loser. I dove into crafting, and for years, those stitches of thread and yarn gave me meaning.
The blog, though, and finally this year uploading my manuscript to this website this year connected me back to what makes me feel like me. I have always been drawn to writing, and not having that or a way to work towards something bigger than just sharing my creations on social media was gnarly. But this blog and your community have helped me find my way back. I mean, heck, Udal Cuain and my original blog, where I shared chapters, was the portfolio that landed me the corporate job. Although it’s gone, what I learned and experienced stayed with me and has made me grow into who I am now. This has been a full circle.
It’s been freeing to admit to myself and loved ones that I was depressed by that career loss. Starting over again has been confusing, but it’s not all figured out yet. There is still time to find a new place where I belong. I’m in the process of recalibrating, and that is a direction in itself. I feel freed from the weight of “monetizing my hobby” and the impossible summit of creating a small business as someone who truly is not cut out for the accounting or marketing parts.
Unmasking and Coping for the First Time
Truly, though, as I reflect on this year, getting serious about health – mental, physical, and emotional – for the first time has contributed to the feeling of optimism I have leaving 2025 that I did not have entering 2025. I have healthier boundaries in relationships, more honesty about how I’m doing, and whether I am feeling overstimulated. I recently got into rebounding, aka a fancy term for jumping on a miniature trampoline for cardio. Wow, I like this for my mind! It resets me, and it’s helping me get stronger. I used to feel ashamed of who I am. I didn’t understand why I felt so different, nor did I know how to communicate burnout without pushing friends and loved ones away. Being unmasked was tumultuous for the first couple of months, but now I never want to put that neurotypical mask back on.
How has 2025 changed you? I think it has made me unapologetically empathetic. Bolder to say I disagree with wrong because the stakes have been higher than ever in my lifetime. I hope to carry that forward into 2026, because I think the opposite of late-stage capitalism is community, so let’s burn it down with empathy. Thank you, dear reader, for spending time with me today. I wish you love and kindness.
A place I didn’t expect to reach this year, was the mental head space of dislike for a dream I’ve had for most of my life. Now could it be burnout and I just need a break? Probably. But I also think it might a healthy thing to acknowledge something you thought you would love, may not actually bring you joy as you wished.
What am I talking about? Sewing. I don’t like sewing as much as I want to. It is tedious, extremely complicated, and requires a level of patience I lack. I’ve been a sewist for 5 years now. I devoted a large amount of my time over the past five years to the study of garment construction, and I realized that it is not my medium, yarn is, and its not a failure to admit I don’t like sewing as much as knitting and crochet.
I think I have known this for about a year, yet refused to verbalize my feeling because it felt like I failed the one thing I always wanted to do. But why is that a failure?
Just because it’s not my passion, doesn’t mean I am going to stop sewing. I think having this space to put less pressure on it to be “my thing” could make me enjoy it more!
Because then I am free to create, to fail, to be a slow learner, to take breaks from sewing when I am ready to cry. I don’t have to feel pressured to get my skills up to par for selling my work. I don’t have to feel pressure to design my own patterns or build a business on sewing. I can go back to basics of what has always been at my core – art. I am an artist, I don’t set out to be, but I know its there inside me too afraid to commit to the bit.
I love what sewing brings me. It’s a fantastic skill to have. I can design my own clothing made to measure and that is luxurious even if my sewing skills are mid.
I can experiement with my style through upcycling. I love how I can recycle and repurpose fabric instead of donating. That is a important part of comsumption. We buy and buy but don’t think about the life cycle of the garment, but with needle and thread you can leave the buy and declutter cycle.
Sewing has taught me to be a wiser comsumer as well. I buy garments that I can’t sew. Complex garments. I also price compare fabric against pieces in store to figure out what is more cost effective to sew. Such as buying a 6.99/yard, one yard cut of cotton jersey to make one long sleeve basic tee. You can buy these from retailers for 35 USD compared to sewing one for 7 USD.
It’s not always cheaper, but sometimes it is and that is a huge win!
Finally, by allowing myself to feel these feelings, my hope is that I will be free to explore and create unencombered by goals of monetizing my hobby, instead that I enjoy the creative process again.
Have you ever tried sewing? Did you find it challenging?
As a kid I carved pumpkins, as I mentioned in my jack-o-lantern pants posts, many moons ago. But as an adult, who has spent many years diving into history, the specifically Irish history of my ancestors, I have found myself switching to a new tradition. Turnips.
The turnip was the orignal carving vegetable for the original halloween, samhain in gaelic. Irish culture gave the traditions of halloween to the British colonizers and Irish immigrants took the traditions with them to America. Trick or treating, costumes, jack-o-lanterns carved pumpkins are all adopted from this key festival of ancient Ireland.
Samhain was a two day celebration. A bit like new year, a bit like day of the dead, and a time when the division between the spirit realm and earthly realm became thin. Fires lit the dark night, masks were worn and turnips carved to warn off evil spirits. The dead could return for a visit and it was unsettling. The world could end, if the gods were not placated.
Of course all this uncertainty is part of the human life and how we make sense of the changing seasons and our unpredictable world. I think its fascinating how they processed these uncertainties in a feast day, abd found ways to distract themselves in the darkness of short days and impending winter. Along with the othet traditions mentioned there was divination and superstitions, like predicting future outcomes with cabbages, or just games of chance, such as finding a small trinket in your slice of pie.
How does the macabre play role in Samhain and why do we have such traditions as graveyards and ghosts? It was a part of the ancient Samhain traditons to visit burial places, make offerings to the dead, and even eat in silence. Of course, while leaving a place at the table for a lost loved one or other spirits that may roam.
There is also a darkness to this festival, and layers to how far things are taken due to beliefs. This is where I stop feeling comfortable, when it gets into the druid roots. It could be quite a sinister feeling ritual, and the druids, well I had to pause my Udal Cuain research because this druid pagan chapter of culture is too dark for me. Any religion that practice human sacrifices is a no for me dawg.
But if you would like to learn more about the lighter and in my opinion, more fascinating parts of Samhain I highly recommend checking out the Ulster Folk Museum’s website.
It’s that time of year when the holidays kick in, motivating me to dream of all that I can make before Christmas. But this year I am doing this a little differently.
Stitch/Life Balance
I started working and planning earlier. I usually think about what I want to make around Thanksgiving, a month or less before Christmas which is an impossible deadline. Last year I made a temperature basket and pushed to finish it in three weeks, it was tedious and down right miserable.
Create Better
I had better out comes with smaller projects, like mittens for my mom. This year I am also using distinct inspirations, so the projects are easier to execute well.
Started Earlier
I started my Christmas planning in August and began work in September, a first for me. I am debating on whether to gift a fully completed sweater or keep it, it was made without a clear goal and is a cozy crochet cardigan. If I choose to gift it then, I actually started in July which is the ideal timeline for me. I would like to start making as early as possible next year.
Holding Projects for January
I have made one Halloween project, but other than that I have been focused on making for other people this fall and it feels great. No stress.
There are several projects in my mind, but I am holding them for later. January feels like this depressing months of “after” all the excitement of the holidays. This usually includes a lapse of creativity too. I tend to push myself to make all my winter stuff in fall. To be honest, it’s dumb.
It can frost as late as June where I live, and snow in earlier May. It is cold for at least the first quarter of the year so why limit my timeline?
I am hoping this new creative strategy will lead to better makes and a happier maker.
Soul Crushing Dread
I am struggling this week to not feel down. The Federal Government shutdown and Pennsylvania Government shutdown is causing havoc for a lot of people. SNAP benefits are being paused Nov 1, so is a program in Pennsylvania which helps people pay for heating costs. You can see the blood of the RSF genocide in Sudan from space. ICE is being spotted more in my state. Every thing is gnarly, to quote Katseye. There are some personal things being worked through behind the scenes, that can drag me down, and I just feel sad. My heart is heavy. I would like evil to disappear. As corny as it sounds, I’d like world peace for Christmas.
I hope you are doing well, and know that you are loved. Hang in there. I am struggling as a sensitive person in these overstimulating times.
Every October, I feel more alive. I don’t mean to sound like a cringe, halloween obsessed person. I think, October fills me with life because it is the first wave of chilly air, and gray, rainy skies. Summer’s heat and bright sun, is great, but I feel burnt out from the stimulation by the end of August. It’s a time to reset and rest, in the spooky season and colorful leaves.
For another reason, I’ve realized this year, Halloween feels like a recharging time, because it is a holiday that is just about fun. There is no family meal, no presents, no longing or ache for those who have died. It is a holiday that does have a focus more on death but in this healthier other space.
It gives me room to breathe before Thanksgiving and Christmas, and the anniversary of my Grandma’s passing, to feel free from this heaviness. For a moment, things feel simple and joyful again.
So to honor this time, I made my first Halloween themed garment with a self-drafted pattern using granny stitches, double crochet, and treble crochet to make this pullover vest breathable.
Purple, black, and orange are colors that work with my existing wardrobe so I believe this piece will fit in all year around…aside from the summer, for obvious reasons.
This is just one of many Halloween inspired creations, I am brewing up. I excited to see those come to life soon!
As a fellow neurodivergent person, or a neurotypical, do you look to October as a time to recharge? What’s your favorite “ber” month?
For those unfamiliar with him, Jeremy Clarkson is a well-known British TV presenter most famous for his work in the automotive journalist industry. His role as co-creator and host of the Top Gear reboot from 2002 to 2015 relaunched the show and made it a global hit. In 2015, he was fired from the show, and together with co-hosts Richard Hammond and James May, he launched The Grand Tour on Amazon Prime, which debuted in 2016. That series ran for six series before concluding in 2024.
In the background of his career as a TV presenter, Clarkson owned a 1,000-acre working farm in the Cotswolds that he purchased in 2008. Until 2019, he had a contract Farmer running the farm, but that changed when the farmer retired, which led to Clarkson taking over the farm and launching Clarkson’s Farm, also on Amazon Prime, in 2021. Four seasons of the show have aired thus far, with the most recent debuting in May 2025. A fifth series has been ordered, with filming likely done by this time in preparation for a May 2026 premiere.
Lessons Learned From Clarkson’s Farm
When Clarkson’s Farm premiered in June 2021, which covered the 2019-2020 farming season, Jeremy had zero farming experience. Previously, he lived in the farmhouse on the estate and allowed a farm manager to handle everything on the farm. He had to buy equipment, hire farmhands, and learn to operate everything. While it is a loosely-scripted TV series, it is non-fiction and filmed in a documentary style. Plus, because of Jeremy’s honesty, which he’s always been known for, you know you’re getting the truth. He isn’t trying to sugarcoat anything. Due to that, his ambitions, successes, and failures, of which there are plenty, teach you the viewer a lot as Jeremy learns.
Everything Is Farmable
In season 3, Jeremy has the idea of making money from the non-arable portions of his farm. This means turning to the areas that don’t have fields in them and aren’t used for animals. He begins harvesting the blackberries that naturally grow on the property and he buys piglets that can live in the woods on terrain that is too steep to plant in. It’s a reminder that you don’t need the perfectly groomed and idyllic land to grow things. Plants will grow in less-than-perfect soil, and some of the sweetest fruit grows naturally and in the harshest conditions, if you’re willing to go after it.
Farming Struggles
Season 1 starts a trend that has continued in every season: Farming is really hard, and there’s a lot that’s out of farmers’ hands. Weather plays a major role in their livelihood and can dictate a farm’s survival if there are consecutive years of poor weather. At different points, Jeremy has to do with record-breaking floods and historical droughts. Extended cool periods restrict plant growth, while lengthy warm periods scorch them.
Diddly Squat Farm (aka Jeremy Clarkson’s farm) [kTb, CC BY 3.0 , via Wikimedia Commons]
Aside from weather, there are the emotions that come with becoming attached to animals that have to be butchered or die from natural causes. You always think about how the meat industry is a business, but if you have a heart, like many farmers do, it crushes them each time animals have to be delivered to the abattoir.
Additionally, equipment breaks and needs to be fixed or replaced, prices fluctuate due to global events (natural or political), and governments make decisions that affect your ability to purchase and sell products. It’s not an easy business, but most farmers stick with it because they’re passionate about it.
Gardening this year showed us just a hint of how difficult growing your own food can be. Some of our plants never grew because of the wet spring we had. Then, the summer brought extended periods of drought that stripped the soil of its moisture. It was hard to keep up with everything while also managing life. I can’t imagine how difficult it must be for farmers on a much larger scale.
Sacrificing Production for Long-Term Viability
In seasons 1 and 3, Jeremy makes two decisions that result in a short-term sacrifice with the goal of establishing long-term viability and success. Season 1 consisted of him planting native wildflowers in portions of his arable land to attract pollinators. He also let these areas go unmaintained to allow animals to establish habitats.
In season 3, he brought in well-known musician-turned-farmer Andy Cato who has established a business built on regenerative farming that replenishes soil nutrients while also producing a sellable crop. Much to the disbelief of Jeremy’s farm manager, Kaleb Cooper, Jeremy stuck with this plan, sacrificing that year’s profit potential in order to rebuild the soil that had been stripped of its nutrients following years of commercial farming practices.
Both decisions represented the importance of exchanging short-term opportunities for long-term potential. By dedicating a portion of his land to native growth and flowers, he willingly gave up the possibility of planting a grain that could be sold. It’s similar to season 3. While he still grew a sellable crop, it wasn’t as lucrative as selling a commonly-grown crop, such as rapeseed, wheat, or barley. However, the benefit of reestablishing nutrients in the soil was more important to Jeremy.
Learning New Skills Can Be Difficult
I believe Jeremy was 60 when Clarkson’s Farm debuted. He had spent the majority of his life behind the wheel of cars. He had no idea how to operate tractors, reverse trailers, raise and lower plows, or fill a spreader with seed. There was a major learning curve, especially for someone who has been very successful in his previous endeavors. Thankfully, he surrounded himself with people who do know what they are doing and taught him, albeit with a bit of sarcasm and attitude. He also humbled himself, which was a new path for someone who was famous for his smug face on Top Gear. Eventually, by the end of season 4, Jeremy actually had an idea of what he was doing. He could generally attach a trailer to a tractor by himself and knew what was happening on his farm.
It’s a reminder that regardless of how much experience you have in a field, it’s always difficult to learn a new skill or hobby. In our garden this year, I learned a lot even though I had gardened in the past. We planted vegetables we hadn’t grown before, experienced insects that we hadn’t encountered, and in-ground gardening brought with it new struggles not found with container gardening.
Impact of Clarkson’s Farm
Bringing Attention to the Farmer’s Struggle
With this show, Jeremy has used his massive platform to draw attention to how badly farmers struggle to make it. I think a lot of people believe that farmers have an idealistic agrarian lifestyle that consists of planting in the spring, harvesting in the fall, a bit of fertilizing in between, and being around animals. But that’s not the case. With so many aspects of their lives out of their hands, they are left at the mercy of the weather, economy, governments, and even global pandemics. One bad decision can lead to them losing their farm. They often can’t take risks because the potential to lose everything is too great. A disease can spread throughout their herd of animals and wipe out an entire year’s worth of income. Yes, there is insurance for these kinds of events, but they aren’t guaranteed to pay full value and can take a long time to pay out.
The Importance of Our Food System & How Fragile it Is
By watching Clarkson’s Farm, you realize how delicate our food system is. We have a great system of trade and infrastructure that allows countries to obtain raw materials grown on the other side of the world. But it’s also a system that can easily become imbalanced. One year of bad weather can result in a nation needing to import wheat for flour rather than growing it domestically. An idiot’s war in Ukraine can upset the world’s food security and lead to scarcity in developing nations.
Thus, it’s important to be able to grow stuff domestically when we can while also accepting that we live in a global society now where nations are dependent upon each other. As much as certain people like to complain about how much we import in the United States, we also export a lot of raw materials and goods. A drought in California or the temperature staying below freezing in Florida can upset the world’s agricultural market. It’s extra important to consider what we as individuals and families can grow. It also reflects the importance of having our own gardens when possible. And remember that when a natural disaster occurs or a weather pattern changes, it’s not the farmer’s fault that the prices fluctuate. Most of that is out of their control, and they certainly aren’t seeing an increase in their income.
Governments Set Farmers up to Fail
An unexpected part of the show is Jeremy, Kaleb, and Charlie Ireland’s encounters with the local and federal governments in the United Kingdom. Most of the show so far has featured Jeremy getting told “no” by the local council for everything plan he tries to implement. Restaurant? No. Farm shop? No. Pub? No. It’s like the council doesn’t want to generate revenue for the local community and district. On the federal level, they have to deal with the fallout of Brexit and the UK needing to develop domestic sources of food or pay more than they were before to import the food. The government promised subsidies to British farmers, but that money went away in 2024.
In the United States, the story is the same. The typical farmer has long struggled for survival. Dairy farmers barely make any money for their milk, and it leads to many converting to beef farming. They’re forced to plant corn for ethanol production rather than feed for their animals. Trump’s idiotic “leadership” has led to an increase in the cost of fertilizer and other farm chemicals because many of them are produced outside the U.S. Then, he doubled down on it by cutting or reducing most government aid programs.
Oh, and it gets better because of his decision to round up and deport immigrants who have been peacefully living in the U.S. for years. Those immigrants are often ones that farmers need as hands to operate their farms because Americans are usually too good for that kind of work. Those immigrants are the ones that we were told would be safe because they’re peaceful. It was just another lie that has resulted in Americans being victimized. Tariffs were supposed to result in other countries buying the vegetables we grow here, especially soybeans, but recent articles I’ve read have said that also hasn’t come to fruition. In fact, it’s worse than it was last year. Trump’s tariffs have led to retaliatory tariffs by China, resulting in them no longer buying our soybeans. Those farmers grew a crop that is no longer selling. At every turn, governments are making decisions that hurt their farmers. Leaders may say that they’re trying to help the farmers, but look at their actions. They speak much louder than words.
Clarkson’s Farm Has Been a Roaring Success
In the years since the show debuted, Jeremy has been honored numerous times by the British Farming Society. He has won awards for his work to bring attention to British farmers and the environment they find themselves in. It’s clear that he’s having an impact on the people who matter: the farmers themselves. He’s quick to point out that he is lucky to have other revenue streams, including the show itself, as well as the amount he earned from previous work. Most farmers have that opportunity or savings to fall back on. At the end of season 1, he gave the honest assessment that the farm couldn’t have continued without those other income sources.
A lot of people hate Jeremy Clarkson due to his brashness and how opinionated he is. But he has always been honest, even if you don’t like his delivery. That transparency is really refreshing in a society where things are masked and people make content just to generate clicks and views. Jeremy has become the voice of the farmer in the United Kingdom, and here in the United States, I think we should adopt him as ours as well. He speaks the truth and his dedication to finding innovative ways to farm is inspiration. I know that after watching the show, I wanted to do everything I could to be more agrarian. Gardening isn’t farming, but it’s at least related to it. They’re cousins. If you haven’t watched Clarkson’s Farm, I urge you to give it a go. It’s not a glamorous portrayal by any means, but it’s honest. And that’s what we need right now.
This is an interesting reflection for me, because granny squares, and crochet in general was my crafting white whale. Since their rise in popularity in the 2020s, the granny square technique, with its colorful bursts of color called to me.
They looked so different from the form and function of knitting. I found myself bamboozled by their craftsmanship, yet enamored by their novelty and variety. Which brings me to a shocking revelation – I don’t think I like them after all.
Yeah…I was not expecting this to be my reaction after crocheting four squares with a brand new colorburst square pattern for a halloween sweater I am working on.
The Importance of Design Point of View
So why, as soon as I made dedicated granny squares for a halloween project, did I not like them? I spent hours learning the colorburst granny square pattern. I struggled with the techniques of the cluster stitch, and the treble crochet corners, but didn’t give up. I expected to feel a sense of accomplishment and excitement, but instead I felt unsatisfied.
This surprised me. The squares and the design of the crochet cardigan with the squares added, didn’t feel like me. I didn’t like wearing them. It clashed with my own personal design point of view.
There was nothing wrong with the design, it just wasn’t me, and neither are the granny squares. And so, I think this is part of being an artist and the process. Learning the new skill is not a waste of time, even though it felt like I was wasting my week working on this design. If I want to be a designer and find my thing, I have to try things that won’t always feel like me, and adjust accordingly.
I’m currently watching the newest season of The Great British Bake Off, and it is bringing back wonderful memories from my childhood, thanks to one special contestant – Iain Ross. Iain is from Belfast, Northern Ireland, and his Irish charm reminds me of my trip to Ireland as a kid. He reminds me of the people I met, including my family members who live in County Antrim. He reminds me of my grandma, Florence, and my Gormley family tree. But I also remember the wonder of exploring this place called Ireland (and Northern Ireland) as an 8-year-old kid, who heard the legends of the places we saw, and found the stories truly magical.
Now, for political reasons, I wasn’t able to see Belfast due to some tensions around Orangemen’s Day. But there were lots of other cities and sites were got to see. There were stories of Dunluce Castle’s kitchen falling into the sea during a party. That was probably true. There are the ruins of tall towers, made to hide in safety from Viking raids, and also historical. But then there were the stories that lean into the fantastical, like the story of Finn MacCool and the Giant’s Causeway.
I had forgotten about the magical origin story of Giant’s Causeway until Iain turned the story into a pastry sculpture for the showstopper round. Finn MacCool, also known as Fionn ma Cumhaill in Gaelic, led a band of mythical warriors called the Fianna. Now, a giant Finn was in a rivalry with another giant in Scotland called Benandonner. To reach him, Finn created the causeway on the coast of County Antrim, which faces Scotland’s coast across the Irish Sea. When Finn saw how big Benandonner, standing in the distance across the sea, Finn decided this might not be a wise idea. Instead, Finn fled to his house, where he hatched a clever plan. He asked his wife Oonagh, to help him hide himself under a blanket, to disguise himself as a baby. Benandonner passed across the sea on the causeway, determined to settle the fight with Finn. He knocked on the door, but instead of Finn, he was greeted by Oonagh and a rather large sleeping baby, which Oonagh introduced as her son, Oisin. This terrified Benandonner. What could his father look like if this were the size of the baby? Benandonner fled back to Scotland, thwarted by the cleverness of Finn MacCool. In his haste, Benandonner ripped up the Causeway so that remnants only remain on the coast of Antrim, at the Giant’s Causeway site, and on the Scottish island of Staffa at the Fingal’s Cave site.
We know now that the hexagonal basalt rocks are evidence of volcanic eruptions that formed the Causeway in Ireland, but isn’t the creativity of my ancestors better? This story is one of my favorites. I may have been able to see through Santa Claus, but this filled me with the possibilities of a land where giants and magic roamed, and it filled me with a sense of wonder to exist in this place of extraordinary things. That’s what I began to explore in Udal Cuain and what continues to bring me back to Halloween every year – Samhain. The original celebration from Ireland.
Have you ever been to Giant’s Causeway? Did you know about the myth, and what do you think of it?
Have you ever wanted to look like you emerged from a cozy video game? Maybe you’d like to wear a hat that reminds you of spooky season? Behold my new crochet adventure, not my first hat, but the second stitched together for this autumnal season.
This hat is inspired by the pointed witch hats, either sewn or made from yarn, that make an appearance in October, either in patterns that I see advertised or inspiration sources online. I didn’t want to make anything too witchy. I am not aiming to be a witch; I am looking for something fantastical. My hat is more of an allusion to the pointed, wide-brimmed headwear, while also aiming to be something a bit historical, rural, maybe hobbity in form.
The inspiration image I used for this project is a hat from Animal Crossing: New Horizons – the frugal hat. It is a subtle nod to a scarecrow, while it could belong in the wizarding world. I chose to crochet this project for the ability to sculpt the hat in a way that is freeform. I love how crochet lets you create without managing all the stitches on a needle; instead, I was able to switch from the hat portion to the bill with ease. I crocheted onto the side of the hat and used varying stitches of single crochet, double crochet, and granny stitch to add the frilly volume to the bottom.
Another reason I chose to crochet, over knitting this hat, was to provide the hat with more structure than knit stitches. Crochet stitches have more body to them. This was a scrap project, using leftover yarn from my first sweater dress, now a cardigan, made in 2023. Which was also scrap yarn, from a previous scrap yarn project – my cat ear beanie from 2024. As time passes, and I make more things, I love seeing how projects are connected through materials over time, because scrap yarn is kind of magical. It’s always worth it, in my opinion, to hold on to the extras for these random projects that call for just a little bit of yarn.
Finally, this hat project was inspired by one other seasonal topic, the state of my country. It just never stops right now….ahhhh!!!
Am I living in the 1950s? No, but dang was this what McCarthyism was like? I’m sick of the FBI telling Black Americans not to mourn Assata Shakur. Charlie Kirk is being touted as a martyr by MAGA and the primarily white church, tainting the message of the gospel with that Nationalist sham of a funeral, complete with Hitler-esque photos by the orange man. It’s getting ICY in a lot of places nationwide. So, I made a witch hat, because the Salem Witch Trials of 1692 and 1693 were not about witchcraft.
Instead, they were about religious extremism, sumptuary laws, xenophobia, and social tension. It was profitable to report your neighbor as a witch. You could gain financial and political power by reporting people who did nothing wrong. So I made a witch hat, because I am done with the injustices being played off as not that serious, and I am tired of our own political witch hunts. I feel helpless and angry all the time because of the Idiocracy. So I made a hat to try to do something creative with my feelings.
This forest creature hat, named by my sibling, was designed by me and created using worsted-weight acrylic yarn with a 5.5 mm crochet hook.
I have been a bit lax with my writing lately, but I’m feeling inspired. The chill returns to the sunny blue sky, orange steeps upon the leaves, and the need to stay warm welcomes me back with open arms. I love fall. I love sweaters, flannel, corduroy, and denim. Getting dressed when the weather is crisp.
These are my favorite outfits, I’ve worn recently, using pieces I have sewn, thrifted, or upcycled. The only piece I bought new is the overalls, because I failed to make my own.
I’ve been getting into whimsy-goth style, like Practical Magic. I’ve been layering with sheer, with knit, and with textures. I’ve been drawn to brighter colors for the darker months. I’m trying to find the joy, before the year ends, and find a better way to end this challenging 2025.
So now that I have sat with my thoughts for months, finding my way out of the woods with my crafts, I am going to get chatty again!
I think what is bringing me the most excitement right now is kpop. Karma has been a wonderland. Chaeyoung of Twice’s solo release was Black Keys perfection. Nmixx new Blue Valentine era is thrilling, Red Velvet-esque, and the most exciting sryling I have seen from a girl group other than Twice in 2025. Taeyong is coming back from the military in December and I am beyond ready for punchy NCT to be back. It’s been 18 months of change and sadness since he left, we need the NEO king back. I’m also impatiently waiting for fellow NCT’s Yuta to release his full album at the end of October.
In other things, Mia is doing well and we are so bonded. It’s everything I hoped for! I’m excited for Saskie & Co’s second book to be released – Saskie Knits. I’d like to get my hands on both of her books. The Great British Bakeoff is back, and that has made for a lovely few weeks. I’m learning new crochet stitches, such as the waffle stitch and granny stitch. I can identify single crochet, half-double crochet, double crochet, and treble crochet stitches. I have also mastered using my yarn swift and ball winder!
I am faltering on my language learning, with a steep decline in practice sessions since June. But I have begun to hear the difference between Korean and Japanese. Even being able to identify a YouTube AI mishap where a kpop song had English subtitles with kanji appearing instead of hangul. By reading the Japanese, I concluded they did not match. I can also tell the difference in speech patterns between Korean and Japanese, identifying key grammar structures. So, I guess, if nothing else happens this year with my language learning, it is marinating up there and I am retaining it.
There have been some really trying personal things going on behind the scenes, that although I probably share too much on here, I can’t discuss. But I can say I have never felt more like I have been drowning than this year. As we head into fall though, I think the source of the stress is healing and I am grateful to be moving towards peace.
My last bit of good news is that I got a rebounder! Also known as a miniature trampoline for cardio. It is a blast. I can’t wait to get healthier and hold less tension in my body.
One Rabbit Riot 