Category: finding joy

#46 – Sewing Studio

One afternoon day, I hit a wall and found a solution in my workout room. You see I’d been sewing in the living room, not because I wasn’t provided the opportunity to have a sewing room, I think I was just being stubborn. Throughout 2023 though, I began to outgrow the living room setup, galavanting from the coffee and dining room tables. My projects were scattered across the first floor of our home. It was chaos. Fabric scraps, yarn fluffs, knitting needles, pins, computer, charger, sewing machine, sewing pedal, notebooks, paintbrushes, etc.

I hit a wall when I felt frustrated for the 1000th time that my sewing machine was bouncing against the circular antique table instead of being balanced on a proper sewing table. I then switched to cutting out a pattern on the coffee table, littered with life and projects, in this ineffective space I cut the wrong piece. In frustration, I realized this was a product of my own decision-making. It was time to level up and clean the workout room for a proper studio.

I think I had been thinking about this longer than I realized, because, after Christmas, I hung up my new bunny calendar and K-pop posters in the workout room, like a future studio. Even though I wasn’t planning the conversion to a studio, it all worked out seamlessly. I moved some things around, decluttered others, and brought the white folding table up from the coat closet. I brought my machine and sewing notions up, including my sewing treasure chest Kyle made me last year. With art supplies, notebooks, and my computer in toe, there was a magic that happened. It was perfect!

The only money I spent on the conversion were new curtains to keep the space warmer, than the repurposed sheets I had sewn into curtains. It’s the breathing room I need to create and the space from this work I need. Knowing I can step away from a project for the night, without having to clean up the items for dinner, is life-changing. I’m sleeping better.

I think since getting married and working from home, I missed that private space, like having my own room again. I can shut the door and escape into my own little world. That was one of my favorite things about life as a single person. It’s good to keep those things, after life changes. I love my life, but I like who I am more with this studio. I am a lot more patient.

My favorite part of this workspace is the natural lighting. It’s so bright and airy, that it lifts my spirits every time I walk into the space.

My Singer Sewing Machine Transformed the Way I Approach Sewing

This is a post of gratitude and retrospect, posted about a month too late but that’s alright. It still counts. I bought my sewing machine a year ago (plus a month) and it has transformed my workflow and productivity while reducing headaches and finger strain.

Sewing By Hand

How you may ask? Well, when I started sewing back in the fall of 2020, money was tight as it was for everyone that year, and machines were out of stock so I started sewing by hand through Bernadette Banner’s tutorials. I kept doing this for a year and a half until I was getting sick of the slow pace, eye strain, finger strain, and lack of structure when it came to making strong seams on thick fabric. My stitches were still elementary and my construction was lacking because the literal sewing process was occupying most of my time.

I’m stubborn and self-destructive in my creative process so I refused to give in and buy one until I was working on my A/W 2022 Collection. I was behind, not finishing things the way I wanted, and downright miserable. My husband who is my best friend insisted that I stop the madness and buy a machine and that’s how I ended up with my pal, Señor Senior Singer.

Why a Heavy Duty Machine?

At first, I was scared of using the machine. I have used three other machines and I didn’t understand how they worked. My mom lent me her 2010’s Brother Machine with a computer stitch function. It had a lot of error messages and broke down. My dad brought me a 1960s Sears and Roebuck machine he found in an attic, it has some serious internal mechanical issues. My Aunt Florence gave me her 2000s Brother machine that has been well maintained and through that experience I got a bit acquainted with the machine sewing process. It was still overwhelming though because I lacked the knowledge to know how to get out of a jam of thread or how to reload that pesky bobin. Don’t even ask me about thread tension or needle type, I was lost.

Through this experience I learned durability, strength of sewing, and lack of computerization was what I was looking for. I want to be able to sew through a tightly woven twill for a coat and yet have the durability to know I can sew for many years. I wanted a machine with reliability that I could count on to not have a computer meltdown during the middle of a delicate project.

Sewing Is Fun Again

A year in, I’m incredibly pleased with the Singer Heavy Duty Machine. It came with a download for a comprehensive user manual and the needles are easy to find and affordable. It has allowed me to finish projects with finesse and speed. In doing so I’ve been able to find balance in my life to write, to knit, to draw, to workout with more regularity, manage the house better and be generally less cranky and frustrated by how my time is being used.

I’m passionate about fashion and this year my desire for the craft has grown. I feel a hunger to level up my skills and create more complicated and beautiful things. The technical part of the sewing process was lifted off my shoulder by Señor Senior Singer and without the space again to get creative, I know I wouldn’t have made as many strides in design and execution as I was able to do. Because honestly, I would have quit in 2023 without the machine. I was so burnt out by the drudgery that is sewing by hand with our modern fabrics.

Thank you, Señor Senior Singer for being in my life a whole year! It’s been a fantastic ride and I can’t wait to see where we taking our sewing together next year!

#41 – Cut Out Cookies

Whenever I am feeling a bit glum, I think of baking. I learned this from my Grandma. Her mom, who lost her parents at a young age and grew up quite poor would make herself “feel” rich by baking a cake.

I think this is such a sweet sentiment to hold because baking is something you can do with a little money or a lot of money. You can make something for yourself for a little pick me up or can brighten someone else’s day. It is shareable, communal, and made with love.

Baking is a moment of connection for me. A connection through the generations. So much about our present world is different from what it has been in the past, except for food. Food bridges those time gaps.

It even bridges distance and time. As I baked last Monday evening, on the other end of the phone my sister-in-law had just finished baking her own cookies and was making dinner. It was like we were together in a shared experience.

Mixing, resting, rolling. The process of rolling the dough to a thin layer, dunking the shaped cutter in flour, and pressing a new image into the dough was timeless. I could have been four or fourteen or thirty and made these cookies with my mom. We always did every year, every Christmas time. I sent her pictures of the cookies and we reminisced about years past.

The dough, the cookie dough reminds me of meals at Eat’n Park and their free smiley cookies. It’s childhood, cozy in a bite. It makes me feel rich in memories and moments spent with people I love.

Baking is my cozy corner of retreat, cut-out cookies my warm fuzzy blanket. I think that is what makes The Great British Bake Off irresistible. What a wonderful place of solace in a gloomy world.

Thank you, dear reader, for spending time with me today. I wish you love and comfort wherever you are.

Instagram Isn’t The Same

Lately, Instagram has been getting to me. It’s something that I’m not proud to admit because it sounds a bit pathetic, but hear me out. I’ve had an account since 2016 and mainly used it to share my travel memories and to experiment with photography as a creative outlet. It was fun and broke me out of my shell because it was an image, not a Facebook status update to perfect or a clever tweet to craft because I’m shy, and those social media sites honestly intimidated me.

And so Instagram was this fun creative outlet to express myself and in doing so share these creative moments with some IRL people and more often than not, new people that over time have become internet acquaintances. I found a community of people who got me when my in-person community was lacking. Later that year when I joined WordPress for the first time under the name Muirin Project I was less scared to share my writing because Instagram taught me there are people out there like me who love creating and connecting across the world. An introvert the world is your oyster type of thing, and I was pleased.

As my account has transitioned through the years through different creative projects, like world-building for Udal Cuain, watercolors, knitting and now sewing it’s ebbed and flowed and never felt like an empty void like it does now. With a focus change, I’d gain and lose followers and I never noticed a big jump or big loss until last year. When Instagram pivoted to add reels for a Tik-Tok style feed and sharing, things got a bit weird. I was in a place of discovery, figuring out what the next step should be with my newfound skills, and playing around with reels. Reels and experimentation with the creator account features opened up a new world.

Growth is Weird

Understanding SEO and the need for traffic to build a bigger audience, the platform’s push to share reels higher into the algorithm was a no-brainer as I was testing the waters of turning my sewing into a business. Reels were made and shared and some did poorly and others gained 1000s of views. For an account of 230-ish followers, this felt big, at times too big, and a little scary. The other scary thing was how there was little to no control over what would be pushed out to the algorithm and I was quickly discouraged by the performance of reels that featured projects I put a lot of work into. Reels however did grow my account and I continued to play around with them until this fall when my desire to spend the time on these little videos died.

What I noticed from 2022 to 2023 is that it doesn’t matter whether I share a photo or a reel, they don’t get shared with anyone, most importantly my friends and family. They just do nothing and it frustrates me because I’m not making them for me, I am making them for what they used to do to expand my reach to new people and share my designs with new audiences. As a creative expression, well I’m not a filmmaker and it shows.

What I did start to notice was a new trend, the creator account features became impossible to ignore. A nice little dashboard was added this year to show you, how in my case at least, my account was failing to reach people. This left me with a conundrum, first how the heck do I disable this feature and second, how much do I care about having an account with a category? I did notice that having my account as an “Artist” account limited the random inappropriate spam comments and follows but was the constant reminder of the dashboard worth it?

That dashboard affected me far more than I wish it did. As a recovering perfectionist and overachiever, this was sending me into a Paris Gellar and Amy Santiago type of spiral! This is a career change and life re-route and it has felt like nothing but failure for most of it because I feel like no matter what I’m behind. Instagram’s creator tools and reels were not inspiring me or helping me to “build my business” like they claim, it was making me feel small because of how the entire app is like a big mirror shining back things through a lens of comparison. I didn’t like nor did I want to accept the bitterness welling up inside at others’ success and achievements. It goes against what I believe to tear others down like that to build myself up. I could tell it was making not feel like myself or spark the joy of connection that it used to.

What Am I Doing This for?

In the spiral, before I figured out how to disable the dashboard and return to my public account, I began to question more than just my success according to the app but the point of why I was doing any of this? What was the point of sewing, creating, writing, etc if nothing would show for it? Should I go back to a dead-end job and find my worth within work and money so I could live the American dream of the house and the stuff? I felt like a loser and I didn’t like how much it shook me.

Because that is not where I find my worth and if you have been around the blog before or know me in real life you know that is not what I believe in.

My mom actually pulled me back into focus with incredible advice, to only create things that bring me joy. Not to create things for growth or success or gaining other’s approval, but to make things that make me happy and the joy and passion behind them will be evident to others. She challenged me to re-center back to why I am doing this in the first place because I feel like I am dying inside if I am not making, drawing, writing, and creating. I’ve been this way my whole life and to be honest the only potential wasted time was the time I walked away from all of it to be someone else and pursue a career for the sake of it in my old dead-end job. But even that wasn’t wasted because God used that time to teach me more about myself and the world around me.

Shifting Sand

This brings me to my current frustration with Instagram, the ever-changing follower count that seems more akin to sand in an hourglass than ever before. I’ve been creating for fun, in joyful and passionate waves of knitting, sewing, drawing, and writing. I’ve been doing it for the sake of doing it, not growing towards anything or having a business. I’ve been making out of love.

Because I’ve been making things out of a deep place of passion and love for the process and artistry of it, it is killing me inside each time I share something on Instagram that I am truly proud of and know that it will be followed by a trickle of unfollows after I share. Of course, there will be new people but those unfollows make you feel like crap because I feel like I shared something deeply connected to me and when I would share, in years past the unfollow trickle wasn’t instantaneous to sharing a new post. It’s like Instagram’s new format is to discourage you from using it with this new algorithm and the bombardment of ads and threads, which I can’t seem to turn off either?

Logically, I know it isn’t that deep and my art is not for everyone. I’ve been reminding myself of that a lot lately, that I can’t be everyone’s cup of tea. I think in those my sensitive artist side just feels so spurned by the world, so it will be a process to learn how to ignore it. I wish the platform wasn’t going in this direction though because those connection moments of the past were so sweet and I miss that. Not everyone was an influencer, a creator, a business, or a professional photographer there was a relaxed and fun nature to it that is missing.

The Chase or The Rock

I’m lacking gratitude, and that is the key that I am missing to feeling free from the dark cloud that hangs over us in this social media age. My account has actually grown a lot this year, far more than I expected reaching past the 400 I was hoping to reach. Recently it swung up to 470+ and I began pushing for 500 by 2024, the feeling of chasing over took me instead of pleasure at surpassing my original goal. Funny how the echo chamber of social media makes us feel less than worthy no matter what we do, and that is why I need to be more vigilant at staying focused on what matters.

As I’ve been praying about this, a random and funny reminder has popped into my mind. I think God has a sense of humor so it makes sense. There is this interview on Top Gear UK between Jeremy Clarkson and James Blunt, during one of the old news segments, where they are discussing Blunt’s tweets. James Blunt was unafraid to respond to trolls with tongue-in-cheek quips, including one about the smaller size of his Twitter account compared to other celebrities and Blunt responded, “Jesus only needed 12.” That has stuck with me because why do I feel this need to chase more and more exposure to my account and my designs, comparison. If I am supposed to become something and do something bigger than what I am doing, cannot God accomplish that with 460? He can do the impossible with even less. This is where He has me and this is what I feel called to be doing, I need to quit looking to the right and the left and keep moving forward. And honestly, kick the rest of that noise out of my mind for good.

I hope this post isn’t too long-winded or weird. This has been in my heart for a while, and I’m still wrestling with it. I’m beginning to realize that it is going to be a constant battle to stay rooted in the right perspective. Just remember that you are amazing just the way you are and have something to offer no matter how big or small your reach is. None of this social media hustle determines how talented you are, it’s as fickle as confused seas. So keep fighting!

Cleaning as a Way to Destress

What do you do when you feel out of control? I used to just blast music in my headphones until I could push the emotions down. For the sake of my poor eardrums, I’ve been trying something new.

I am a Tornado

If you knew me in real life, you would know that I am not a great housekeeper. I am more of a tornado of creative chaos, whether it be in the kitchen or in my workspace, there will be messes and clutter. As a creative person, sometimes I honestly don’t notice the chaos or clutter around me, I just see what I’m working on and if I have completed my project according to my vision.

It’s not a good way necessarily to go through life, but it is my authentic self. As a kid, this led to a lot of nagging me to pick up and friction with my mom and grandparents because I was not organized or faithful in straightening up my room. The same with vacuuming, dusting, or remembering to do the dishes before my mom got home from work. Now as an adult, it’s an internal battle I wage with myself between the chaos tornado and the desire to keep things tidy.

Over the years of working from home, I’ve learned that a chaotic space is not a productive space, as they said many times before, and yet I’m still a bit slow to do something about it. It wasn’t until watching Business Proposal that I began to connect the dots.

Kang Tae Mu

While watching Business Proposal earlier this year, a now beloved classic in my house, I related to a lot of the main characters. The one I did not expect to feel a kinship with was Kang Tae Mu. He is a young president of a company, he is rich, polished, and in control. The opposite of me. It wasn’t until the mask of perfection cracked and I saw the vulnerable moments of his character, the heartbreak and stress of his childhood, and his perfectionism as a coping tool that I realized we are not so different.

There is this moment, that truly endeared me to his character and opened my eyes to my own poor coping skills. Tae Mu and his friend Mr. Cha go to Mr. Cha’s apartment after work (Mr. Cha is his assistant) and Tae Mu cleans everything. Mr. Cha just steps back and out of his way, while Tae Mu works out all the emotions rattling around his mind in chaotic fractures by cleaning, and later cooking. His character decompresses by putting things back into order when he feels out of order and out of control. I never thought of cleaning that way before.

Gellers and Gilmores

I had seen it portrayed less healthily in the show Friends through Monica’s character. Monica’s character does this in a more unhinged and controlling way. But Tae Mu’s cleaning is so much more relatable. I mean it makes so much sense that tidying things can be a productive way to release the frantic energy of big emotions. In the show Gilmore Girls, emotional outbursts are normal. The characters rant, they yell, they express their emotions with big displays and that is usually how my feelings come out. In big messy paintbrush strokes over my relationships and my little house. I don’t like that anymore. I want to be kinder, gentler, a positive person to those around me.

I know I’ll still have those moments, but I’d like to minimize them and cope in better ways. Like not pushing the emotion into a box and tossing it to the back of my mind or feeling stressed and tense. So I’ve been trying to clean, when I really feel like I’m stuck.

Cleaning to the Beat of Wonderland & Item

I was feeling down in the dumps today, it was just an amalgam of bad communication with my husband, a cold, some other not feeling good things and discouragement. A lot of little things kept going wrong and my highly sensitive personality was feeling overstimulated. I was messing with my ability to focus on my current mitten project, my NaMo WriMo start, and planning blog posts.

I realized the only thing I could authentically change to set my day on a better path was to do some cleaning that had fallen by the wayside while I had been sick. With my earbuds in place and a playlist of Stray Kids’ 5-Star and Ateez hits I set to work on a kitchen deep clean. It is incredible how the first five songs of 5-Star changed my mood. The pacing of the music woke the dopamine centers of my brain back up and I was jamming through my stovetop scrubbing. By the time I switched to Ateez, I felt this weight lifted off. The stovetop was shining, the kitchen floor was lemony-fresh, the dishes were sorted into the drying rack, and the laundry was done with its spin cycle.

My environment was different even if my problems and little irritations from the day still existed, I was less stressed because I was able to do something to release my tension. Something active and productive. I felt like I was running my day, not my day running me over.

#32 – Keystone Safari, Nook Inc. & Loneliness

I am full of delight with hints of fall dancing in the cool breeze of a cold front and speckling the leaves of trees with those first hints of autumn. This is my favorite time of year, as summer fades into a golden glow that leads us into the merriment of fall, Halloween, and beyond towards Christmas. I’ve noticed these little moments as I walk around Keystone Safari, a place that has refreshed my soul more than I could imagine. I’ve found a safe, consistent place to walk and be surrounded by nature. Not only nature but the beauty of creation because Keystone Safari and its sister park, Living Treasures. They are two wildlife conservation parks nearby that have brought a sense of peace and wonderment to an otherwise mundane small town.

Through these experiences, I have been able to see penguins, lions, giraffes, kookaburras, kangaroos, mandrills, anteaters, and more up close and have been astonished by the creativity in their design and the magnitude of what an incredible world we live in.

I love animals. I have since I was a child and if I had been a better biology student, maybe I would have pursued a career where I could take care of animals. Not being in a house currently where we can have a pet, I forgot how comforting being around animals can be, even healing. The opportunity to go feed, pet, or just observe and learn about animals from around the world has been a great blessing. Getting more sun, fresh air, exercise, and experience around big groups of people again has been good for me too. I am not good with crowds.

The reminder of that smacked me in the face on Monday when I went to a local county fair and immediately panicked, by the sea of people. As I walked back towards the animal barns in search of the ‘Goat Olympics’ and rabbit judging, the constant waves of people made me feel like a salmon fighting against a current. No matter what I did I could not relax. My usual trick of looking at the sky did not calm my mind. Instead, I felt like I was white-knuckling it until the exit gate came into view. I feel embarrassed when crowds get the best of me and I wish I could be one of those people who is unphased by the spectacle of it instead of feeling overstimulated.

Something that does bring me back to a state of calm though is a short visit to my current Animal Crossing island. I recently deleted my previous island Acorn and created a new island called Oddinary in hopes of creating a cozy fall-themed island with the fall recipes that will be in the seasonal rotation again. The name of the island is inspired by Stray Kids’s EP Oddinary featuring the songs Venom and Maniac. There is a spooky vibe to music videos that I thought would meld two of my favorite things – fall and k-pop into one cozy place of my imagination.

If you have never played the game, and my knowledge is limited to New Horizons, the game follows the 12-month calendar and is a little escape from reality on an island that you transform from deserted to a community. For me living in a hyper-individualistic (more like selfish) culture, it is like living in another time when community was important and cheers me up on the days I feel lonely.

Although my life is full of blessings, I’ve been feeling melancholy and hiding away in knitting and sewing projects. I need to continue to dig into my devotions, and my faith and trust the process of what I am going through with my parents because God does not leave us in states of loneliness, nor does He forget about us when we need people. He brings people into our lives to fill the gaps of those who have left us and He sustains us with His love and mercy. That’s what I need to focus on and instead, I tend to dwell on what I want not what I need. And I have so many great people in my life who want to be there.

One of those amazing people is Kyle and I think each day I grow fonder of him. Each day we find something new that we have in common and for that I treasure the peaceful bubble that God is leading me towards, cutting away the distractions yet surrounding me with friends who want to be like my family. For that I praise God.

The steadfast love of the Lord never ceases;
    his mercies never come to an end;
 they are new every morning;
    great is your faithfulness.

Lamentations 3:22-23

Genuine Moments

I used to be a regular Youtube viewer, especially as a broke newlywed, free content on Youtube was a must compared to paying for streaming or cable. In the mid-to-late 2010s, it was a happening place filled with adventure and wonder. Some of my favorite channels during that time were ones that have gone on to big success, the trap of overconsumption of ideas, just plain fell apart or have run out of ideas.

These channels covered the things I was yearning for – adventure with my best friend, the fun of trying new things and translating fashion knowledge to real life. The videos back then were less planned, and more chaotic, and felt like you, as the viewer, were their plus one coming along for the ride. Along the way though, things have changed. Maybe I’ve changed, maybe they changed, or simply just the world is a different place. But there is something different about Youtube videos, a magic spark is gone.

It could be the sponsorships and the AdSense money that has made it less genuine. Or maybe it’s the success of the channel that actually ruins the genuine moments of those early videos? Like there’s a chasm between the viewer and the content due to unbelievably or fakeness because this is a production now! That kind of thing irks me.

I find myself opening the app, scrolling through my subscriptions, and then switching to YouTube Music to watch a music video if I watch anything. It’s just stale. The videos from these old favorites are monotonous, uninspired, and unwatchable. Of course, I’ve moved on to new channels, but even with these new options, Youtube is not the happening place it used to be. I feel the same way about Instagram too. Any hold it used to have on me for scrolling thankfully is lifted and if I am going to waste time on a device, it is usually running across my island on ACNH.

So, why am I rambling about this? Well, I was struck this morning by such a genuine moment on social media from Yuu’s Adventures. It filled me with warmth and I wanted to share these genuine and wholesome places on Youtube that I hang out in now. Because I realized the magic spark is not over, it’s just in some new haunts.

  • Yuu’s Adventures – Warm welcome to Japan and its culture. Educational, heartwarming, and down-to-earth. Yuu’s storytelling pulls you in.
  • The Fast Lane – This channel is OG Top Gear UK if it was in Colorado. Real consumer advice, cheap car challenges, epic road trips.
  • The Wads – Kimberly Whisk will melt your heart. When I miss my grandma, I watch Kim. She has been a mini-mentor to help me find my footing as a wife and woman as life goes on after disappointment.
  • The Maine Woods – Cory & Gracie are heartwarming. Cory restores cabins and explores the woods of Maine with his trusty black lab, Gracie. She is an expert at finding Moose sheds.
  • Simple Living Alaska – Eric and Arielle share recipes, show how they build things, and share their adventures in Alaska living simply. They’re not selling you anything.
  • Geography King – As Kyle (that’s his name, not my husband) puts it, this is a place to find geography videos from a nerdy type perspective.
  • Kogarana’s Bunny Popo Channel – This is pure cuteness. The owner, Popo-chan the bunny, and Peto-kyun the cat, make some of the most relaxing and comforting content I have seen.
  • Reed Timmer Extreme Meteorologist – passion and real heart, intercepting dangerous storms to study and help people stay safe.
  • Stray Kids’ Vlogs – Are you feeling lonely? Here are eight new friends/brothers to keep you entertained. Join the family and let the laughter ensue. In their spare time, they make music.

I hope this brings a little sunshine to your day. 🌞 Stay tuned for knitting and sewing posts coming soon! I’ve been quite busy knitting up a storm. Until next time! 💓

#27 – Scones

Each week I find myself, hands covered in dough. The way I used to be as a kid, except instead of baking bread or sweet roll dough, I make a little thing called a scone. Or “scon” depending on whether you hail from Northern Ireland. It’s a simple thing. A new part of my routine. That little moment of quiet time, as I cube the cold butter and measure the dry ingredients. It’s a ritual. Between my fingers, I delve deep into the bowl molding vegan butter, sugar, flour, and baking powder into a sandy mixture. A sandy mixture that feels like the sand on the beach, a little wet, pliable. The sand I still love to squish in my hands, in a drifting mindless void of experiencing the texture. A sensory delight.

In the rhythm, I cube the butter. Careful, long cuts with a sharp knife divide, and divide again until with swift chops little butter cubes line up on the counter. Flour cup after flour cup, building a powdery mountain in the bowl. A sprinkle of sugar, leavening, and salt. Blend, blend, blend, and watch Youtube. Let your mind drift away to far places. Watch the squirrels hop around the yard. Add water and raisins, and make a wet, sticky dough. With a spoon drop the scones one by one on the parchment. A warm oven, here they go.

My scones are a bit like biscuits, a little like shortcakes. A dash of raisins, the quick lift of soda bread. They are an amalgamation of what I remember relatives baking for me as a kid, and a new thing influenced by new boundaries. New limitations by a dairy-free restriction put into the practice of a nostalgic moment. I cannot bake the way I used to, but I can still make things with new ingredients. I can carry on the old ways of the past but in a way that makes sense to me.

Coming from a Northern Irish background, my grandma’s side called them “scon” and she made them with raisins. She drank tea and ate them with a little butter. Traveling south, I had biscuits – buttery and lightly sweet biscuits which felt like these scones of my memory. Strawberries and shortcakes, with a dash of whipped cream, a dish reminiscent of evenings at my mother-in-law’s house. A quick baked treat after a long day of hard work, that we would eat while my father-in-law showed us old episodes of Star Trek. Irish Soda Bread is an item I discovered later on in life to celebrate my heritage. A treat my mom would make on St. Patrick’s Day. Its dense yet fluffy texture creeps its way into my scones. These are a bundle of memories in one bite.

A bite I have quite often now. A bite that is my current breakfast staple with a handful of berries and almond milk whipped cream. I eat this with a cup of Yerba Mate.

I used to avoid breakfast, I simply wasn’t hungry. Then I picked up some bad habits like granola bars, pop tarts, or sugary cereals to start my day. This is the first breakfast routine, I appreciate. Maybe it’s the responsibility of making those scones by hand and keeping the freezer stocked for the week that has given me agency. Or an open eye to how food is nourishment, not fuel, not the enemy, nor is it a coping mechanism that reminded me to enjoy this simple thing.

It’s Monday, and I only have one scone left. I’m honestly looking forward to getting my hands covered in dough, in my little weekly routine. To create that taste of home in one bite. For the love of baking. The joy of homemade, handmade things that are a privilege to make.

I hope you have a wonderful start to your week!

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