For a week, I decided to do something a little different with my Bible reading. Instead of reading a chapter or two, from whatever book I happened to be studying at the time, I’ve been reading, slowly, methodically over the first 40 verses of Psalm 119. If you’re not familiar with this passage, Psalm 119 has a unique structure. It is 176 verses in length that are divided into 16 sections, each section is named for a letter in the Hebrew alphabet. It’s not a quick read! And usually, I don’t approach this reading with enough attention. My usual posture is to power through its length, but this time I wanted to get a bit more knowledge out of it. The idea was to push my mind to get acquainted with the text and the wisdom of the lines of the page.
Because to be honest, this chapter is dense with words, imagery, and lessons. The sentence structure of the ancient Hebrews is tricky, I read the words in the wrong order and sometimes miss the point of what I am reading. So either I can get discouraged by the intricacy of studying this section of the Bible or I change my approach. I chose to expand my idea of what my time studying the Bible looks like, as an experiment to see if meditating on the words, is as important as they say.
Restful Reading
After my interval training workouts, I like to cool down by laying on my yoga mat with my legs and feet up against a wall. The feeling of my back realigning while the lymphatic draining, makes me feel leaner, and the posture of lying on my back staring at the ceiling provides a moment of total relaxation after pushing my muscles. It is something I look forward to. Sometimes I push myself to workout, just to do this part. Usually during my legs against the wall session, I’ll watch a Youtube video or possibly a music video, something that will excite my mind with stunning visuals or thought-provoking content, usually about fashion history.
But what about those seasons of dryness? I’ve been in a three-week slump of a spiritual desert. I want to dig into the Word, stay focused on the Lord, and be prayerful throughout my day. I have not been. I’ve been leaning into distractions, into music, video games, etc. So I decided to challenge myself during a rest on my yoga mat, to leave my phone on my dresser, and pray. To be completely alone with God, and dwell in His presence instead of distractions. With a rapid-fire list of K-Pop songs swirling in my head, I asked God to help me focus on Him and Him alone. I wanted the ability to shut out all distractions.
My internal playlist went from 11 into a whisper, then silence. Like a volume dial turned by His hand.
The next day, I missed my workout but I was craving some downtime. After my shower, in the quiet of the evening light, I spread out my yoga mat on the wood floor and extended my hand out towards my bed, to my Bible. I asked the Lord to guide me, what should I be focusing on tonight? What would you like me to learn about you? I felt a pull towards the Psalms, instead of my current place in Isaiah. To Psalm 119. Not a psalm I gravitate towards, a marathon more than a read to me.
I was thinking about the way in which Biblical scholars read the Bible, and how the Israelite men used to study the scriptures in the temple schools. The slow recitation of the scriptures, a wandering path through the wisdom instead of a sprint, in order to store the word of God in their hearts and minds.
Scripture Stored in My Heart
Although I’ve been reading the Bible a lot more since 2020, I do not have the scriptures memorized. A few verses here and there from Sunday School and Christian education, but not a backlog of wisdom to pull from in moments when encouragement is needed. I’m disappointed in myself for how little attention I’ve had to studying and memorizing so that it is in my heart. So many other useless things I carry around in my mind like quotes that make me laugh or lyrics to entertain me but, none of these sustain me.
I felt quite convicted by this. I like to put 100% into what I do, for the glory of God. I’m a passionate person. Understanding that in reality, I am not as passionate about learning scripture as I would profess. Because if I was, I would be doing it. Seeing the reflection of who I really am and what my priorities look like, can only be from God, but also was a harsh reality of how much spiritual maturity is still out there waiting to be acquired. If I only give it my full attention. That’s the tough part. It requires discipline, focus, and drive. This world is waiting with bated breath to keep us as distracted and far from God as possible. We have to push back the distractions with our own free will to seek God and seek His will in our lives.
The Start of Something New
Fully convicted and invigorated for change, I opened my Bible to Psalm 119. I asked the Lord to help me only focus on Him and to learn what He would like to teach me through this time with Him. I began to read slowly, line by line. Slowly, line by line, reading, considering, pondering the meaning and significance of each line.
א Aleph
Psalm 119:1-8 NIV
Blessed are those whose ways are blameless,
who walk according to the law of the Lord.
Blessed are those who keep his statutes
and seek him with all their heart—
they do no wrong
but follow his ways.
You have laid down precepts
that are to be fully obeyed.
Oh, that my ways were steadfast
in obeying your decrees!
Then I would not be put to shame
when I consider all your commands.
I will praise you with an upright heart
as I learn your righteous laws.
I will obey your decrees;
do not utterly forsake me.
The lines hit me differently. In a fashion, I can only describe as meditating on the word with the Lord. Some words jumped off the page, and others carried more weight than they had before. It was a remarkable time of fellowship with God. I’ve now read this first section, at least six times over the course of a week. Each time slowly, with time to ponder how this wisdom applies to my life and the world I exist in. I plan to discuss more of what God has been teaching me as I read through Psalm 119. Thank you, dear reader, for spending time with me today. ❤
